The two sides of a Sacrament
Any
sacrament has two aspects in it: the “objective”
grace of the sacrament, and the “subjective”
one. They are both operative within the human being who receives the sacrament,
but they operate differently. The “objective” one is the core of the sacrament,
what constitutes it. The “subjective” grace is the capacity in us to handle the “objective”
one. Let me explain that aspect with an example. Don’t be surprised since I’ll
take the example of Priesthood, the Sacrament of the Order, it just helps us “see” better the double aspect.
When
a baptised human being is ordained priest, he receives two graces of different
types:
1- one
is the “seal of Priesthood”, which is Jesus’ objective and active presence in
him, Jesus as the “head of the Church”, the “Leader of the Community”: it is a
service to his brothers and sisters.
2- the
other one is the “grace of Priesthood”, a specific grace that helps the Priest, in
his weakness, handle the weight of this "active Presence of Jesus in him", and
bare fruits.
Remember
that the Presence of Jesus in the Priest is unique for it allows him to act “in
the Person of Christ”: Celebrate Mass, consecrate the bread and wine (by
repeating Jesus’ words) into the Body and Blood of Jesus, lead the Community, give the Absolution from sins in the sacrament of Reconciliation and manifest in a more specific way the Presence of Jesus-Priest amongst us.
This "active Presence of Jesus" in the Priest is something much higher/bigger/heavier
than the normal human capacity (the natural side of the man who is a priest). Therefore, in order to carry it, and perform
his tasks in a well-fashioned manner, the Priest needs to be able to handle
this “divine weight”.
To a
degree, we can say that the person of the Priest has two sides, or two
“beings”:
1- one
is his “divine” side: the Sacramental Presence of Christ-Priest in him, head and leader of the Community;
2- the
second is the “human side”, the way he lives and handles his Priesthood. The
presence of a specific Grace in his human nature helps him handle the “weight”
of this Presence of Jesus in him. This specific grace is given jointly with his
Priesthood. The ordination in fact (like any sacrament, including Marriage) is a double grace. God gives
all together “a Gift” and “the power to handle this gift” (to hold it, to manage
it).
We
often focus our attention on the greatness of the Priesthood and we forget that
this greatness is put in a normal person, a weak human being, that needs help
to handle this greatness. The greater the Gift, the greater the graces given to
help handle it. God's gifts are holy and they require holiness to be able to handle them. The Gift comes with the necessary help to become, step by step, holy in order to handle the Gift.
When
we look at a Priest - any Priest - with
the eyes of faith, we need to remember these two sides/aspects in him. When
a Priest “looks” at himself “in a mirror”, he “sees” these two sides in himself.
Therefore,
it is not enough to focus only on the Presence of Christ in the Priest (the
Seal of Priesthood), since it can lead us/him to forget all the personal work
he has to do in order to be able to receive the grace that help him handle the
Grace of his Priesthood. This grace will lead him to the necessary and specific holiness he needs in his call to Priesthood.
I
would say that the Sacrament of Marriage has as well these two aspects in it. I
call them, with a little exaggeration: the “divine side” and the “human side”
of the sacrament (any sacrament). Forgive the exaggeration, and please try to
see why I am using it. I am not splitting the atom, or splitting the sacrament,
on the contrary I underline all the human responsibility in order to handle the
sacrament. God doesn’t give us a great sacrament (each sacrament is great) and
leaves us with it to deal with it. We would be helpless… holding with “weak”
hands a very precious Gift.
We
have everything in the Sacrament of Baptism (the central sacrament of our life):
through it we receive all the Life of the Trinity in us. It is like a Divine
Seed, and we are supposed to make it grow. But we hardly hear about the second
(“subjective”) aspect of the Sacrament, that deals with the “human side” of it:
the specific grace that God gives us in order to help us feed this Divine Seed
in us, and take care of it, until it reaches fruition.
Sacrament of Marriage
I am
sure that, by now, you can visualize, in a better way, the Sacrament of
Marriage. On one hand, God puts this “Fountain” of graces at the reach of the
hand of the spouses, and on the other hand He gives them the needed help to “handle”
this “Fountain”, to draw from it everyday. (see this Blog, that speaks about the Fountain)
One
has to learn how to “use” the sacrament, and how to do so on a daily basis.
This
brings us to what I want to say: “look at the Fountain, and look as well to the Grace that helps you make use of
the Fountain”.
God
doesn’t leave the couple, in their marital life, alone without help. Within the
Sacrament, God gives a grace to help the couple remain alive, capable
constantly to rely on the Grace of God they find in the Fountain.
Therefore
it is important to acknowledge the fact that God offers us His Help in order to
make use of the Grace of the Sacrament.
Let us take one example: if the couple
doesn’t learn to pray together on a daily basis in order to ask for the Grace
of God and learn to rely on it, if the couple doesn’t draw from the Fountain
God made available to them, they’ll end up by looking similar to any other
marriage. Because of our weakness and lack of spiritual transformation, it is
much harder to deal with the “burden” of Marriage. Indeed it becomes a “burden”
instead of a “help”, a “stimulus” in our way toward holiness.
Marriage
is a real way toward holiness. For
this reason God is ready to give all the needed graces to the couple, to their
family (children), in order to reach holiness.
I
hope you start to see the dynamic aspect of Christian Marriage.
“Ask
and you shall receive.”
“Ask”
is the grace that helps the human side of the Sacrament.
“and
you shall receive” is the Grace of the Sacrament itself.
Very
often we have the Fountain at the reach of the hand, but we don’t activate the
grace of “asking” in order to Receive Water from the Fountain. “Asking” is a
simple basic grace given to any human person who received a Sacrament.
The
Sacrament is still alive, like a new Fountain installed in the middle of our
inner Garden. The Spring is capable of giving water, but we need to draw from
it. It becomes then operative, dynamic, in us.
2 comments:
It is wonderful to have this explained... especially the fact that a "fountain of graces" are made available to the married couple. I wanted to get a better idea of the kind of graces a couple specifically receive in the sacrament of marriage compared to baptism for instance, considering both ultimately aim towards holiness?
Thank you again for the above!
Leonora
Each vocation receives the needed graces in order to fulfil it. We are all called to holiness. But each one of us has his/her specific call. Through this specific call, we grow and reach holiness.
Marriage means living all the time with another person who is dear to you. Realistically, one rapidly discovers that this person is different from you (culture, education, gender specs, character, temperament, tastes, choices, spiritual level, ...) . On a daily basis, these differences can become very heavy. We often are not prepared to face them with wisdom and prudence. The couple needs graces in order to bear the normal difficulties that come from the "differences", the daily frictions, struggles. With the Grace of God, these "difficulties", that often can become "serious obstacles", can be transformed into victories and success.
Without the grace of God, and because of our weakness (sins, ...) marriage instead of being a "help" from somebody who looks like you (see Genesis 2:18 and ff), becomes a struggle. With the specific grace of God given through the Sacrament (graces that we need to draw from the Fountain), the "struggles" become again a "help".
United in asking for the Graces, the needed Graces, the couple becomes a real Power of Victory in society. Prayer made together, the Prayer of two (or more (children)) is SOOOOO powerful...
If all are called to holiness, not all are married, not all have a daily friction/struggle... not all have to build, as a couple, their own house. Therefore you have "specific graces for that". When a person marries, he/she is not anymore alone, he/she cannot decide alone. He/she has to take into consideration the other. They are one in their bodies, one in their souls, one in their spirit. So this new identity requires specific graces in order to succeed and reach completion.
Help me God to understand my husband, to be patient, not to be egoistic, to help when I can, not to compare what I do with what (he does), help me speak to him, and learn how to express my feelings, help me listen to him, help me help him... help me pray for him... help me invite him to pray... help me learn to take time to pray... (the list of graces to ask for is long Leonora... the same applies for the husband of course) :-)
I hope this helps.
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